Thursday, November 30, 2006

citizen's arrest

lord knows that i am not nearly stylish enough to be a part of the fashion police, but today i wanted to make a citizen's arrest on their behalf.

today i saw a man in a suit, black suit, black socks, and black crocs.

yes, that's right, he was wearing a pair of crocs with his suit.

i can only assume (read: hope) that they were his walking to work shoes, and he has a pair of normal shoes at his desk, but lord oh lord, let me tell you, it's not a look i reccomend.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

anger is a bitch

do you ever get angry about something that you really wish you could just forget?

i am not generally an angry person, it usually takes a lot for me to get angry, but apparently not today.

and here's the kicker, i'm angry about something that i really shouldn't care about.

the story is pretty long and boring and not actually the point of the post, but basically it has to do with me agreeing to research something, then suddenly expected to plan it (i'm fine still at this point) because no one else is, and then being shit on for my plans.

and seriously, in all normal real world situations i wouldn't care. but for some reason, tonight i'd driving me crazy.

i'm angry enough that i'm feeling it in my body, i feel myself all tense and yucky, i am clenching my teeth, i am thinking about it over and over again, and i can't seem to let it go.

and i know that it's stupid and i shouldn't care, which somehow makes it worse.

i have no idea where this is coming from, and i really wish i could just not worry about it, not be angry, but then i think about the fact that i'm going to have to deal with it more tomorrow, and then i'm angry all over again.

bleh.

i wish i could just take some mega sleeping pill to knock me out until it's all over and done with.

bleh again.

a goofy picture of me

I know you are all anxiously awaiting pearls of wisdom to drop from my lips, but, surprise surprise, I apparently have no time ever to write posts…


Instead, I hope you will be mollified by this dignified picture of me.



Saturday, November 25, 2006

stormy weather pictures

okay, not stormy, just windy. this was in kincardine ontario (so these are pictures of lake huron), many moons ago, when we went to look at the school house (so the same time as the other pictures i've posted recently) i think what i like about these is that at first glance you can't tell where the water ends and the sky begins.









Thursday, November 23, 2006

resolutions

okay, so i'm making a november resolution. i've never been much into new year's resolutions, but i do believe that resolutions have their place as useful tools.

so, here's the resolution, it's a joint one between john and i...

we will no longer eat in front of the television. dinner time will once again become a nice time to sit down together and talk. i used to love the dinner ritual, but for some reason we slipped out of it. but we've pulled our dining room table out of the corner and we're going to eat dinner together every night.

so, i will be back to my routine of picking up groceries on my way home, turning on 'as it happens', making dinner, putting on some jazz, pouring a glass of wine and sitting down with my love for dinner. i may even institute some candle lighting.

it means that the house is bit cluttered with the table in the middle of the dining room (don't ask, it's a small place, it's usually jammed in the corner until we need it) but i think it's worth it. i also think it's possible that we can do some thinking about furniture moving so that it works more effectively, although i wouldn't be betting my life on that one.

so, there you have it, my november resolution.

of course, tonight i will be dining alone, john's going to see borat, i have declined joining him. so i will be feeding my lonesome self.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

child at heart

apparently i have reverted to my 6 year old self.

i want it to be christman NOW!

now now now!

why isn't it christmas yet!?!

this is particularily amusing when you consider that i haven't really started my christmas shopping, and i really do need to get some stuff done and started.

but nonetheless i am impatiently anticipating christmas.

i am so very excited about this christmas. more excited than i have been in years.

i am not going to do any running around on christmas day, or even boxing day for that matter.

usually christmas day for us is chrismas morning somewhere, then brunch somewhere else, then chirstmas dinner somewhere else, then another christmas on boxing day. it's bloody exhaisting.

but not this year. this year i will have christmas morning with my favourite people, then mellow for the rest of the day. maybe catch a matinee, maybe go for chinese food, definitely nap. just generally hang out.

i'm very excited!

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

true love

you know it's true love when you're home sick and you phone your partner at work to whine about feeling crappy and he ends the call with 'thanks for calling'.

it was very cute, and very nice.

Monday, November 20, 2006

an email conversation in 6 parts

John: There's a Beaver's tail outside by the path. I'm confused.

Mainja: Like a doughy pastry yummyness, or a severed body part?

John: The latter. (The former, I think, would be called a Beavertail rather than a Beaver's tail)I'd be grossed out about it if I weren't so confused.

Mainja: Ewwwwwww.That's horrible!!!!!!!!!! (here I proceeded to send it to a million people in the office complex)

John: Well, if they're interested, they can go see it by the new stone path between Mcdonald block and Whitney block. Closer to the Ferguson block. Unless whatever left it there has now taken it again.

Now in the email conversation, a friend who will be known as chuckles to protect her innocence...

Chuckles: Ha! John said 'beaver'.

playing pretend

i don't have time to post today, so instead how about this...

everyone pretend that i have written already. pretend that it is witty and insightful. pretend that you liked it so much you want to read it again.

see, wasn't that fun?

Friday, November 17, 2006

tgif

yep. glad it's friday. yay friday.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

drinking on a school night

it's possible, just possible mind you, that one should not get plastered on a weeknight.

it was pretty hard dragging my ass out of bed today.

having said that, i had a really fun night last night.

i have a friend who i see on a semi-annual basis, last night was the second time i've seen him since we moved to toronto last august. the irony is that for the first chunk of our friendship he spent time telling me to move to toronto. then we moved to toronto and he moved to orangeville. silly bugger.

anyway, it's always lovely to see him, except for the part where it reminds me how much i miss him.

and then another friend (noone, that sexy librarian man...) came by, which was also very nice, because, well, he's one of the people i love most in this world, so it's always lovely to see him.

so, maybe it was worth the hang over, although i imagine i could have done all those things without quite as much alcohol.

and now, off to the oh-so-productive day ahead...

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

return on investment

i have decided that there is an investment that the ontario government could make that would reep far more than was sewn.

the ontario government should start providing their employees with free coffee in the office.

the return on investment (refered to as ROI from here on in) would be dramatic.

there would be an ROI on time, as employees would no longer need to trudge out and find a coffee delivery mechanism. although these are currently in the building, they are still 'away' by a certain margin, so going to buy a coffee, including standing in line, usually takes 15 - 20 minutes. 15 - 20 minutes that could be spent writing a briefing note instead of searching out coffee.

there would be an ROI on productivity, because really, who isn't more productive with caffiene in their system? sure, you might say that people are going to get coffee anyway so that is a moot issue, but in fact, i have many a time been working towards a deadline and not had time to get coffee. sometimes i'm lucky enough to catch someone on their way and thrust my travel mug and toonie in their hand, but more often than not i go without caffiene.

there would be an ROI on moral since everyone would think, 'gee, they must really value me as an employee to splurge for free coffee!'. okay. this one might be a stretch, but probably someone would think it, and if you make a difference for one person, just one person, doesn't that make it all worth while?

there would be an ROI in actual time spent on work, because instead of writing about not having coffee in their blogs, civil servants would already have coffee and therefore nothing to write about, and therefore time only for work related activities.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

election vindication

so, it was municipal election day in ontario yesterday.

i live in the municipality (?!? seriously, is it still called a municipality when it's this big?) of toronto. i'm sure this isn't really what it's called, but that's what we'll go with for now.

i could care less about the municipal race in toronto.

the guelph race though, that one i care about.

i was pullin' for karen farbridge to get back in, and she did! some may say that it isn't that big a deal for someone to get *back in*, but you see, she wasn't the mayor on the last round. nope. last round of municipal elections for some completely unbeknownst reason (well, unbeknownst to me anyway) the city of guelph decided to elect in a right-wing woman for mayor. to be a bit harsh perhaps, she also seemed like she was a bit of a tool when she was running her campaign, dumb, not astute, clueless, the whole bit. and yet, she got in. she beat the left-wing incumbent (karen farbridge) and got herself the mayorship of guelph.

and it was a mess.

she was terrible.

well, this year the unofficial results are in and karen got 50.96% of the vote, kate quarrie, the incumbent mayor, only got 35.49% of the votes.

it's as if the city got together and said "sorry karen, we don't know what we were thinking, please come back".

i don't imagine it's saying particularily good things about me and my feelings towards where i live that i don't care one whitt about the election here in toronto, but i am filled with glee over the one in guelph.

Monday, November 13, 2006

vacation lethargy

i have the day off. apparently that means i don't want to write in my blog either. so, here's another picture to keep you occupied. it's from the same school house. i think i'll call it school house bondage...

Thursday, November 09, 2006

how about we try a picture again, shall we?


we have been looking at buying a 'holiday home', with a focus on dilapidated old buildings that we can fix up and make glorious. this is the back of one of the places we looked at. mostly i like the sky.

fire drill observations

i have come to the conclusion that fire drills in office buildings are held simply to remind people on the 18th floor just how nice and crispy they will be if there ever actually is a fire.

luckily they get a good 45 minutes to ponder this fact as they shuffle down the stairs.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

on being a better blogger

everyone has an answer for how to become a better blogger. if someone starts talking on their blog about writer's block people come out of the woodwork in the comments to suggest something to do.

lately a lot of those suggestions have been to use maggie mason's new book nobody cares what you had for lunch: 100 ideas for your blog. there seems to be some mixed feelings about the book, i haven't read it myself, so i really can't comment.

but frankly, i'm not here to comment on content. content is irrelevant. i'm here to talk about what a brilliant marketing move it was for maggie to write that book.

here is a woman who saw a market, a new market, a thus far un-tapped market, and she filled it.

that takes some vision.

good book or not, it sure as hell was a good idea.

my hat's off to you maggie.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

indian sunburn

okay, for the context of this i need to confirm everyone knows what an indian sunburn is.

urban dictionary defines an indian sunburn as:

to take someone's arm and twist in different directions, until the arm is bright red

i have no idea why it's called an indian sunburn. what the hell does this have to do with indians? and are we talking first nations here, or people hailing from india? i mean, if we're going to be offensive we may as well know who we're maligning. there is probably some kind of politically correct version of this now, but i don't have access to the youth of today, so i don't know what they're calling it these days.

but i digress...

context done, story begins:

last night i was having a massage and my massage therapist said she needed to do some fascia work. apparently this does not mean she was going to put the front boards on our (non-existant) deck, but rather that she was going to work on the "band or sheath of connective tissue investing, supporting, or binding together internal organs or parts of the body", in this case the stuff just under my skin. apparently it can layers can bind together and it can limit mobility.

as she worked and i tried not to scream (essentially i pay someone to torture me...) it occured to me that it was a bit like a great big indian sunburn on my back. so i said, laughing; "gee, it kind of feels like you're giving me an indian sunburn all over my back" then i laughed some more.

there was a pause.

she said "uh... well, i basically am..."

uh huh. i pay someone to do this.

Monday, November 06, 2006

neil patrick harris and the whole gay thing

i have a soft spot in my heart for neil patrick harris. not just because of doogie, but because of other things i've seen him in, all of which i currently forget.

this weekend he confirmed he was gay, in a way that made it just a part of his life, not some big deal. i really liked that. surprisingly enough, i was also impressed with people magazine, who did not print a headline about mr. harris coming out. the headline was "neil patrick harris tells people (the magazine, not just random people on the street, although possibly that too) he is gay" the little subtitle read: "Neil Patrick Harris is gay – and wants to quell recent reports that he had denied it."

which is much better than one headline i read about neil patrick harris 'coming out', even though it really would appear that he was never 'in'.

or, the most horrifying one that i saw today while waiting for the subway (it was on one of those little tv things in the TTC subways that run headlines and advertizements) which said "neil patrick harris admits he's gay". ADMITS?!?!?!?!?! excuse me?!? since when is being gay something that one 'admits' to? i can see if he'd been hiding it, if he'd been playing straight, and then the admission is not that he's gay, but rather that he's been misleading people, but admits he's gay? i was bloody incensed. okay, apparently i still am.

but seriously, i mean, come on people!

i guess what i'm saying is sometimes the media sucks. i know you're all shocked at this wild revelation, but well, you know, that's me, hard hitting and revealing.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

kraft dinner woes

why oh why does kraft dinner insist on having that stupid little tab?!?!?!

what tab you ask?

why, the little 'push here' tab of course!

you know, the one that is supposed to be the convenient way of opening the box. the one that is never actually perforated all the way through, the one that is FAR harder to open than just opening the top of the box?

but the problem is that for some reason i *always* feel the need to try and open with that stupid tab. always. and i'm always thwarted. always.

not that i was eating kraft dinner or anything...

Friday, November 03, 2006

mayor miller and the toronto port authority

not to get political or anything, but since when can you say a report is shite and untrue just because you don't like what it says?

some really quick background for those of you outside of toronto... there is a downtown airport heretofor refered to as the island airport. the current mayor really hates the island airport. the island airport is run by a federal gov't agency the toronto port authority. the federal government commissioned a report on the port authority, the mayor was happy because he thought it would encourage the feds to disband the port authority and hand the running of this stuff over to the city, at which point the mayor could squash commercial flights from the island airport.

but...

the report essentially said the port authority was doing find and reccomended the status quo.

at which point the mayor said "the report isn't worth the paper it's written on". the explanation of why this was not a worthy report? well, all i heard (this was all on a radio show this morning) was that it was against the will of the people.

i should take a moment to point out here that i could care less about the report, about the island airport, about the hubub. i really have no position on it one way or another. for me i suppose it's an out of sight, out of mind kind of issue. i'm not likely to ever use the airport, nor does it infringe on my day to day life.

but when you end up saying a report is crap because it doesn't say what you were hoping it would say, well, one would hope that you would have some reasons to back up your statments. like, i don't know, pointing out a flaw in the research, or pointing out that research conducted wasn't used, or something. and who knows, maybe all of that happened. and maybe that's what mayor miller said, who knows, maybe it's just been reported badly. in which case he needs better speaking notes. because really, these ones are just making him look like an idiot.

just to be fair, i did find online a quote from him saying:
"I find the report, it's really unsubstantive," responded Mayor David Miller. "I was very surprised by the tone and quality of this report."

which is vaugely better, but not much.

but this isn't the only time i've noticed this. lately people have been saying things are wrong and the only reasoning for why it's wrong is because it's not what they expected/wanted...

people are weird.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

how *not* to start your day

I suspect there are loads of articles out there that will tell you all about how to start your day if you want to be productive and lucid.

This is not one of them.

This in fact will only outline one thing, of no doubt many, NOT to do if you would like to have a clear-headed productive day.

So, in fact, really, it will be of little use, but that's never stopped me before, and I won't let it stop me now!

Are you ready? Are you ready for the pearl of wisedom that is about to drop from my lips fingertips?

If you are searching for a day where you can face the world standing tall you should not:

- Fast for almost 16hrs (including no caffiene or artificial sweetners, water only), then have 6 large vials of blood removed from your body

The truth is it will fuck you over for the whole day. Well, my current scientific study of the matter can only tell you that it will fuck you up until at least noon, but I'm guessing the whole day.

If I encounter any startling revelations, or there are any unexpected changes from my hypothisized outcome I will let you know. For now I will continue my experimentation, all in the name of science and keeping my readers informed of course...

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

What sets you appart? Oh, and Descent at Theatre Passe Muraille...

This is kind of a two part post. But the two parts are related. Well, at least for me they are...

My first is kind of a question. What sets you apart from the crowd, if anything? Do you have something that someone *always* comments on? I do. And I think I like it, but sometimes it horrifies me. It's my laugh.

I have had people stop me in restaurants to comment on my laugh, I have had strangers passing me on the street turn around and say "great laugh!", I have had random people who happen to be in the audience of a play at the same time as me tell me that I should get a job as part of a laugh track or get people to pay me to sit in the audience during tapings of sitcoms, I have had actors who I know come up to me and say they want to hire me to be in the audience of a show they are in (I'm pretty sure he was joking, I never did ask for money), and tonight I had actors I don't know ask me jokingly to be in the audience every night because it was so great to have me and my laugh in there.

That's all great, right? I mean, what the hell would there be to be horrified by? It's all wonderful positive stuff, and really, come on, I'm an actor (or, at least, that's what I went to school for) so I can certainly deal with being singled out and noticed.

Ah, but there is the rub.

It isn't all great. It isn't all people ooohing and ahhhing over my laugh. Sometimes it's people turning around in their seat every time I laugh. Sometimes it's teenagers pointing and snickering. Sometimes it's old ladies harumphing loudly to express their distain. Sometimes it makes me want to crawl under my seat and I can only imagine what it inflicts on others.

But I should be clear, most of the time I'm just fine with my laugh. I am happy that people like it. I am happy that it helps people know they're appreciated. I'm happy that it evokes laughter in others. Mostly it makes me happy. I just think it's interesting that something that is such a positive can have such a sharp negative side.

And so, I did say this was a two part post...

Tonight I went to see Descent by Tom Walmsley at Theatre Passe Muraille.

I have to say, I really do reccomend this piece. The acting was great. The script was interesting. It was a healthy mix of hilarious and heart-ripping. I'm not saying it was the best piece of theatre I've ever seen, but I've seen a hell of a lot of theatre. I am saying that it would have been well worth the cost of a ticket. Of course, for me it was the cost of an extra half-hour because I volunteer (ushering) so I get in for free, it's a REALLY good deal.

Oh, right, I also said the two parts related... Here's how:

While waiting outside for my ride (aka John) the actors all came out. One of them looked at me and said "wow, it was so great having you in the audience tonight, thanks for that", which prompted another to day "OH! Are you the laughing woman?!?", which, of course, made me laugh, confirming her assessment of the situation.

And I loved it. I loved that somehow, during the play, I made a connection with these people through the fourth wall. An individual, recognizable connection. That's an amazing feeling.

And I know it from the other side too. I know that when you're on stage, if there is someone in the audience, someone you've never met before, who you somehow, for some reason, connect with, that's an amazing feeling. And I can't describe why. Part of it is knowing that they are wrapped up in the show, that you are helping to tell a story that draws them in. But part of it is somehow more viseral than that, maybe it's just a different version of "our eyes met across the crowded room...", maybe it's all part of being singled out in a crowd. Which is hilarious if you think about it, since you're on stage with what, 2, 3, maybe 4 other people? And, the "on stage" bit pretty much dictates that you 5 are going to be the centre of attention while the auditorium is dark except for the big bright lights focused on you. But still, there is something about that individual connection.

Ummm. I guess the short version of this would be: I had a pretty cool night tonight. Oh, and I laugh a lot.




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