Thursday, February 22, 2007

Fragile – Handle with care

I’m feeling very fragile this week. And, as my cumulative sleep over the week diminishes the more fragile I feel. It sucks. I hate feeling fragile.

It’s also a very strange juxtaposition too, because the truth is I love my life right now and I’m really happy. I have the new house, the country air makes me happy, the prospects of what it will someday be make me happy, the excitement of owning something again makes me happy. I have a position at writing about theatre (I’ll be posting my first article today actually, I’ll be sure to update this post when I do…) that I’m so excited about I could pee with joy (pee with joy? WTF, what’s that?!?!). I have a permanent job finally, doing work I love.

Honestly, I’m very happy with my life right now, and happy in general.

But for whatever reason, this week I’m so fragile I feel like crying at the drop of a hat. It can be an interaction with a person, it can be a commercial, it can be a story on the news, it’s brutal. The truth is that I think I’m in some weird hormone hell because my period was doing weird things this month too, but damn, I wish it would stop. Not only is it generally unpleasant, but damn it, it’s embarrassing!

It also doesn’t help right now that John’s away for most of the week, if I’m already feeling fragile then suddenly not having that supportive body next to me makes it all the more acute.

I’m not sure what the point of this post is. Just telling the story I guess…

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