Tuesday, February 26, 2008

forced interactions...

Have you ever been in a situation where you really want to interact with someone, but they're not responsive?

There's this guy who was one of my best friends for several years in high school. For some reason I'm dying to connect with him again. So, facebook came into play and now we email occasionally.

He lives in North Bay, so I can't very well say 'hey, lets go for a pint', which is, of course, the easiest way of doing things.

The challenge here is that he's never been very good at the whole written communication thing, and I think actually that it kind of annoys him, although he hasn't said so. So, it's possible that the non-responsive is just, well, the hating email. But of course, for some reason, the more he doesn't respond the more I want to email him. The more I want to tell him all sorts of stuff that he may very well not give a shit about.

I was talking to Paddy about why I am so desperate to connect with him again. I'm really not sure what it is. But if I were to take a guess, I would have to say that it's probably that when he was one of my best friends I was pretty brutally depressed, and talking to him and stuff offered me some respite from it. It brought some much longed-for joy in my life. So, if I were to guess, I would guess that the sudden need to reconnect has something to do with the whole depressed thing - you know, seeking out the familiar.

Anyway, I'm sure by the time I'm no longer depressed anymore he'll think I'm a very crazy woman who is stalking him from a-far. I'm not. I have no idea what's in his garbage. Nor do I know what time he leaves the house. ;) (or, you know, his address, his phone number, what he looks like these days, wow. I make for a bad stalker...)

And of course we all know he's *crazy* to not leap at the chance of being friends with me again, because, well, really, who's a better friend than me?!? I get depressed, I cry on the phone, I write long mournful emails. Who wouldn't want that in their life? ;)

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