(in)visible

i noticed something today, in some cases the more visible someone tries to make themselves, the more invisible they become.

i was walking to work and on my way a man who looked a little rough around the edges (hadn't bathed or had a haircut or clean clothes in a long time, homeless in the most stereotypical of ways) started trying to talk to me. he did so by yelling really loudly, and rather incomprehensibly, and gesticulating wildly. the more he did to draw attention to himself, the more i blocked him out.

it was strange, and i have to say, i felt badly about it. i mean, if he's that desperate to be seen, it probably hurts him that much more when it seems like no one sees him. it's a brutal kind of cycle.

at the same time, there is something scary about it, i'm not sure what that might be, 'cause really, if you think about it, what is the danger there? i mean, considering it was 8:45am at bay and welleslyish, so it's not like i was in some secluded alley or something, it was safe. physically. but i'm not sure it's safe emotionally. and i'm not sure why.

i don't know, it's just all pretty facinating to me, i will continue to mull over this and if i have any brilliant revelations i'll get back to you. ;)